We NEED Relationships With Each Other
Women are relational beings. It's a fact that few would deny. God has built us with an innate desire to connect with others. It starts when we're very young and follows us into adulthood. I've often watched my daughters playing with their friends while I'm making dinner or working on a project. One minute they're laughing, and the next they're crying. One friend will feel left out while another wonders why she can't be "the mom" every time the kids are playing house. Oh the joys of being female.
Today I saw a friend of mine across the parking lot and we spoke for an hour about all that has gone on in our lives since we last saw each other. She's not online so I never "see" her. How sad is that? Something I've noticed over the past few years though, is that grown women don't seem to be connecting like we used to just a few short years ago. You know, the "short" years before the Internet. I'm noticing a disturbing trend among women lately. We would rather text than call. We'd rather check Facebook to see how our friend is doing. It's easier than real-life conversations and less time-consuming than a phone call. When was the last time you called a friend and just talked for a while?
I’ve noticed too, that women in mid-life often struggle with relationships. As the children grow, the demands on our time change. As the family grows, the dynamics change. The demands on my time are so much greater now than they were when all of our children were little. I still have five young children at home and my oldest children are in their early twenties. The older ones are going through their own sort of growing pains, spreading their wings—and they need me in a different way than the younger ones do—all this means that at the end of the day, I’m very tired—and I have less time now for things outside my immediate family than I once did.
In the midst of our busyness, the temptation is to let "little" things go, like meeting a friend for coffee or getting away for a weekend to learn and grow together. Google hangouts are easier, right? Now don't get me wrong; I'm a huge fan of virtual friendships! I love the moms I've met online but must confess—the women that came to my home after my recent surgery reminded me of the value of nurturing the relationships around me. I was in awe of what a little thing like a card in the mail can mean. (Do you know what I mean?)
The Bible also tells us that friendship is important.
The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.
I’m so glad for friends who will encourage me to be more like Jesus! When I started speaking with Real Refreshment a couple years ago, I noticed that the women we talking about the same kinds of struggles: marriage, children, homeschooling, "doing it all." Sitting around a table with women from many different walks of life reminded me that we are all in this thing together. Coming together once in a while is a wonderful thing.
I hope you'll take some time out of your busy life and join us for a couple days of rest and encouragement for your journey. We need each other!
Heidi St. John
Heidi married her college sweetheart, Jay, in 1989 and shortly afterward they went into full- time ministry together. Since then the St. Johns have become happy parents of seven children (ages 2 – 22 years old). In 2004, after 17 years of pastoring, Jay and Heidi founded First Class Homeschool Ministries, a parachurch ministry that helps churches reach out to homeschooling families by hosting a homeschool cooperative. Jay and Heidi also speak and lead worship at homeschool conferences and other related events. In 2010, Heidi’s first book, titled after one of her favorite workshops, was published. The Busy Homeschool Mom’s Guide to Romance combines lighthearted humor with a straightforward look at the importance of nurturing marriage throughout the homeschooling years. You can learn more about First Class Homeschool Ministries at www.fchm.org or contact Heidi at email@example.com. You can find Heidi on: TheBusyMom.com – Twitter – Facebook